Ma...

Another Mother's Day passes by,and the answer to my brother's yearly question over the phone remains the same...
bro: Hey,did you get her something?
me: I don't need a day to celebrate our bond..!!Nope,no gifts..!

What got me thinking this time,was a mocking chant in my head that found voice right after the phone conversation..
I could probably count the number of times I would've told her I loved her.
For someone who is called the queen of melodrama,when it comes to expressing my love for her I find myself to be surprisingly inept.There is,of course the every morning goodbye kiss before I leave to college,but now it seems to be more out of habit than anything else...

In our relationship,its only take take and take more...there is no balance,there is no reverse equation,there is no acknowledgment.From my side,its selfish love.I never feel the need to tell her...
"Whats the point?Of course she knows I love her!She means the world to me,and I will always be there for her..I mean which daughter wouldn't?"

She is the epitome of selfless,unconditional,sacrificial love..The kind we dream for from our life partners.Funny we don't consciously appreciate the fact that we already have it in all its abundance and glory.
I've always taken her for granted and never felt the need to work on our bond..all I had to do to make her love me was spend nine months in her womb,and there you go,my job's done!
I will fight her when she refuses to go along with my impulsive desires,
I will make a fuss,shed tears and blame her when she points out my mistakes,
I will prefer an impersonal hamburger from McDonald's to her lovingly made crisp and hot pakodas,
I will stubbornly refuse to train my voice just because it is her dream to see me become an accomplished singer,
I will realize all that I have done and yet find it hard to own up to it and apologize because I know she loves me anyway,
I will finish writing this post and yet think twice about letting her read it..

Oh but I love her so!
The sight of her worried face after a long day in college is like a glimpse of sunlight between large,ominous gray clouds..
Her encompassing hug is like a shield against the big bad world..
The smile in those tender eyes is like experiencing a free fall,so much love,so much concern,so much joy for all your little achievements...her love knows no boundaries,no commas and absolutely no limit.

As I begin to recollect all the cherished moments I've spent with her,I decide to do my very best to be a better daughter..I know I can never repay even a fourth of her contributions to my personality,my character and my life in general,but I promise to take her to the day when she can look back and proudly tell the world,that she is my mother.